Friday, October 15, 2010

*You don't know me like that!*

I'm very sad to report that the Alfred Angelo store is not only a disappointment, but the most frightening shopping experience I've ever had in my life. It didn't take long after getting into the store to realize that there was something fishy going on. Immediately a scary lady came up to me and got way too close to my face.

"We have to hurry up because there is an appointment at five!" boomed a lady of clear self imposed importance. "It's okay..I'm a pretty independent person. I like to look and try on things by myself anyway." She looked down her nose at me. "NO! WE do not let you do things on your own here at Alfred Angelo! NOW WHAT SIZE!!!"... What size?! Do you have to ask it so harshly, lady? Could we have a little small talk first to ease the pain? And could you please give me a little personal space?

She then proceeds to tell me that I have to come out after trying on every dress so she can put her hands all over my back with these fabric clippers. All I could think was: "You don't know me like that, woman! Nobody knows me like that!!!" It was completely and utterly OUT OF CONTROL! Then she told me to take off my pants and shoes and I raised my voice a bit:"NO! NO, NO, NO!!! I will NOT take off my pants and shoes!!!!" I couldn't even act like I wasn't freaked out. Has she ever heard of something I like to call HUMAN RIGHTS?!

My eyes got as big as the half ton man on TLC by this point. I thought I could find safety in the dressing room, but I was mistaken."Hang up every dress after you try them on! DO you hear me?"....DO I HEAR YOU!?!?! Pretty sure I couldn't stop hearing you if I tried!!! Did I mention the tight three garment rule and how she treated me a like a hoodlum? How about the fact that she acted like I was lucky to be in Alfred Angelo and I felt like I was catering to HER. She badmouthed David's Bridal some too and David is the man.

We both decided it wasn't even worth trying on anymore and left immediately. I would not be surprised if she vacuumed up the floor where we stepped and sent us a "you're welcome" card for allowing us to be in the presence of such "greatness". Not okay.

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